Depression is not a constant. Depression is a sea. One day it can be calm and flat. You can feel the sun on your face as you safely sit on the shores, still surrounded of course, but everything’s okay. You can breathe in the salty air and think how grateful you are to still be alive. But the earth is constantly moving, and along with it the moon, so in a blink the waves begin to churn and you see the storm on the horizon. You can scream and cry and beg for the storm to be kept at bay, but just as you do not have control over the weather, you do not have control over your mind. And so the sea pulls you in. Perhaps slowly, perhaps forcefully, either way it does not matter. All of a sudden you find yourself drowning and overwhelmed and it seems there’s no way out. Then, just like that, just when you’re about to give in, to let yourself finally go, once and for all, the clouds part, and current softens, and you’re delivered back to the comforting warmth of the sand. So you return to your life, trying the best you can, dreading the day the storms return but hoping you’ll survive again.